Late night ramblings

Me: I need to get a second husband.
Him: Oh? Why?
Me: So that he can play your video games for you, and I can cuddle up with you.
Him: Makes sense. I need a second wife.
Me: To have sex with you?
Him: Okay. I need a third wife!

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Him: Baby, you're not crazy.
Me: ***blank stare***
Him: Next to you, a crazy person seems perfectly normal!

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No, these aren't lines from the latest new sitcom. These are the type of little quips my family makes each day. (I'll be sure to post some from my kids soon.) I love the relationship we have with each other. We're comfortable enough to laugh and joke with each other, and yes, sometimes even tease. Yet at the same time, the love is so obviously there.

I don't believe my kids ever question whether or not we love them. If anything, they complain that we love them too much. I remember one day last year, one of my son's friends told him he wished his family was more like ours. Bear replied back, "no you don't. We're constantly doing family outtings, games, etc, and we spend most of our time together as a family. It's a real pain!" I laughed when he told me this.

He complains, and yet on weekends where is he? He's not out partying with friends, roaming the neighborhood, or finding some sort of trouble to get into. He's here. At home. With us. I've even told him that I want him to go out and have a social life. I want for him to be faced with those difficult choices we all face as teenagers. I want him to go to parties and have to choose whether or not to drink, and then to have to choose to call home when he's in over his head.

Yet, other than Scouts and soccer, he's here with us enjoying family time. I can't help but feel that this is a great thing. This is a new cycle that is starting with this generation. It's a cycle where love is shown very strongly, family loytalty comes first, and children feel more love than they could ever imagine.

One day, they're going to grow up, go off to college and start their own families. They'll call every couple of days at first, then just on Sundays, then on birthdays and holidays. If I'm lucky, we'll all be able to get together once a year to celebrate the love we all have for each other.

But for now, they're here and I'm going to enjoy every single moment I have with them until they do go out into this world on their own. For now, I'm going to laugh, joke and tease. For now, we will keep doing family projects each weekend, play games together, watch movies, and just love each other.

There is only one lesson we can give to our kids that will truly have the biggest impact upon their lives and the lives of their children. That lesson is teaching them how to love. Now, how can a parent teach a child to love if they don't take the time to cherish each moment with their kids? How can a parent teach a child to love if they aren't willing to put that child first in all things?  If a parent is too busy being an adult to do weekend projects, family game nights, sit down at the dinner table, make breakfast on weekends; if we're too busy being adults then we're teaching our kids that love comes last.

I don't know. I'm tired so I'm rambling a bit. All that I do know is right now, right this moment, I have a very strong relationship with Big Bear and Pie. I have something with Honey that I've never had with anyone else.

Off to bed I go, before I do get any mushier over here.

Before I do though...

Little Man or Bio Mom, if you should ever come across these writings, don't ever believe we've forgotten about you or that we've given up on you. Even now, I am still doing everything I can to keep my promise to you, Little Man, to keep you safe, happy and healthy. And Bio Mom, please know, the door is always open. Always. Love is unconditional like that. No matter what is said or what is done, love is forgiving. It gives you options that you may never realize you ever had.

So often each day, we all think of you. We tell an anectodote or comment about how one of either of you would have liked this, or how we'd like to get that. The days are still long, and hard, and full of sorrow and worry. At the same time, the days are also full of love and joy because, that's what love and family gives you. It gives you the happiest of moments, and strength to keep going. Though the house is full, it still seems very empty at times and there is always room for two more.

Love is. Remember that, both of you.

Good night dear world. May your hearts leap with joy more often than they sink in sorrow.