For Security or Love?

The other night, I had a dream. It was a bit of an odd dream. An old instructor whom I had a crush on long ago came to me. We went to eat, walk around a store of some sort, and just hang out. Out of no where he turns to me and says "Tell me the truth; did you marry your husband for security or because you love him?" Without so much as a second's hesitation, I scoffed and said "security, of course!" When I awoke, I was pleased with that answer, and I still am.

Don't get me wrong, it is always best to marry for love but let me tell you a secret that took some time for me to learn myself. If you don't feel secure, you are not truly in love. If you feel totally and completely secure with someone, you also love them. You can't feel secure if you don't love the person.

Security is much more than a paycheck coming in, and a roof over your head. Security, this kind of security, is a trust that is so deep, nothing can crush it. Now it is very easy to confuse love with other things such as lust, passion, desire, and temptation. But you can't confuse trust with any other thing. You can't confuse true security with any other emotion. When it's there, you know it whereas often times, especially when young, we think love is there but it is actually something different.

But once you feel secure, once you know you are totally and completely safe with another person, once you have that trust built, you just know that the love is there too. No questions. No doubts. So when my children ask me how they know if what they are feeling is love or not, the first thing I will ask is "are you with them for security,or for love."

If they answer for the second, then we already know the great hidden truth.

In one month, it will be our anniversary. It's funny. Though it's only been 5 years, it seems as though he was always here.

Okay, I"m done being all mushy now! May you all have security in your relationships. <3