I have to say that I love the messages behind the Madea movies. They come across so loud and clear; Tyler Perry definately is not shy about it either. There is no beating around the bush. There are no cute fuzzy critters to teach you about love and friendship. And if the women in these movies find their happy endings, it's not because it was handed to them on a silver platter. They achieved their happy endings.
Many years ago, I watched my first Madea movie. I can't remember for sure, but I believe it was Family Reunion. Just a brief recap, one grand daughter was getting married, while another was in a very abusive relationship.
Honestly, the one getting married didn't really phase me much, it was the one in the abusive relationship. It's been a while since I've seen it, so instead of trying to convey the exact words, just the message here will do.
Be nobody's victim. Nobody's. Nobody is going to beat you down if you don't allow them to. The only thing stopping you from standing up and walking away is you. Don't take crap from anybody no matter how they disguise it to be. Love isn't equal to pain. Pain isn't equal to love.
That man, he starts beating the crap out of his woman and she stands up, throws a pot of boiling grits in his face and that was IT. It was done. Okay, so a bit over the edge and would likely result in jail time but the message behind it was just simply take a stand, stand up for yourself and defend yourself by what ever means necessary. That's something us girls could stand to learn and remember.
Tonight, Madea went to jail. In this one, the Madea character plays more of a back seat comedic role, though some of the points she makes are the ones that drive the rest of it home.
This one spoke of forgiveness, not just for others but for yourself as well. And it also spoke of moving on; not letting life hold you back. Just a recap of the plot line here.
Young assistant district attorney is in love and engaged to be married to another young assistant district attorney. The first came from "the projects". When his old friend, Candy, shows up as a defendant in a prostitution case, the fiance tells him quite simply "she had the same opportunities you had. You took those opportunities. She took other ones." (paraphrasing here.) And she's right. We are all given the same opportunities for success.
Okay, so mine may be packaged a bit differently than yours and vice versa. But it's the choices we make that defines our path in life.
Later, it's revealed that back in college, his friends asked him to invite his friend (the defendent before drugs and prostitution) to a party. He was unable to attend, but they said they'd keep her company. Then, they gang raped her in his absence. This, I feel, was a big part of the motivation for him to become a prosecutor. To bring people like that to justice.
The girl however, this was her motivation to fall and fall hard. She couldn't deal with the life she was handed. So, in her way, she hid from the life she was handed. As the minister in the movie said during one powerful scene, she and others like her, were so busy hating those that harmed them, every little thing they did was to punish those people. But in the end, all they were doing was punishing themselves. Those people still had a wonderful happy life, meanwhile she and the others were sitting in jail. "Forgivess isn't for them, it's for YOU."
In other words, we all create our own personal hell or heaven as it may be. Anyone that has wronged us, at any degree, is not sitting at home saying "I shouldn't have done that!" No. It's likely their harms don't phase them what so ever. Why continue to try to punish them by holding ourselves down? And yet, we, especially us girls, tend to do exactly that.
In the same scene, Madea stands up and says something though, that too few people have ever been told. Most of us don't figure it out until we're much older in our lives. If only we could figure this part out so much sooner.
Our parents have only one job and that's to bring us into this world. (Paraphrasing again.) It doesn't matter what they do after that point, whether they give us a good life or a bad one. Maybe they beat the living snot out of their kids, maybe they sexually abused them, maybe they treated them like royalty, or maybe they had to fend for themselves. It doesn't matter what happens after the birth process. Our parents have only one job. Bring us into this world. They did that.
After that point, it's OUR road to travel. The choices we make, those are OUR choices. Our 'predators' are no more responsible for our failures than they are for our successes. If we fall into a life of unhappiness and uncertainty, that isn't their fault. It's our own. (By predators, I mean any person that intentionally causes another person harm either physical, sexual, or emotional.) If we fall down and don't get back up, that isn't someone else's fault. It's OURS.
This particular movie was about forgiveness and personal responsibility. Yes, it had it's funny moments and it was off to a very slow start as they built the backdrop for it. The message though is still the same. If you choose to shut yourself off from the world because of past hurts, that's all on you. Only one person can lift you up to glory. That's all on you. Once we take that first breath and receive the first slap on the ass, the rest of it is all ours.
He says it, and he says it loud and proud through a medium that most young people are affected by.
No comments:
Post a Comment